We are all doing our part to social distance and stay home during this time, and staying home means more time with our best friends: our pets! We want you to meet some of our honorary Access members. Take a look at the below to get to know our paw-some pets!
Name: Tupac Shapurr
Species: Cat (occasional rapper)
Favorite food: Bread
Likes: The outdoors, rapping, birds, other cats
Dislikes: Dogs, Biggie Smalls
Favorite song: Any of my own (Hit ‘Em Up if I have to pick one)
Favorite movie: Above the Rim
Favorite TV show: Dave or Tiger King
Contributions to Access: Attacking the dangerous computer charger cord, also making sure Nadav has to get up every 5 minutes to let me in/out.
What’s your alternative “dream” career and why? Actor, all rappers want to be actors right?
Name: Bailey “Da Muffin” Linck
Species: According to doggy DNA test, 50% Poodle, 25% Dachshunds, 12.5% Gordon Setter and 12.5% crazy
Favorite food: JIF Extra Crunchy Peanut Butter
Likes: Attention and naps.
Dislikes: Baths and listening. When other dogs are getting pet instead of me (rude).
Favorite song: “Gimme More” (Attention) by Britney Spears
Favorite movie: The Grinch with Jim Carrey. Have to admit, I have a huge crush on Max
Favorite TV show: Wishbone
Contributions to Access: I’ve been a regular on team video calls since 2018 when Mom and I moved from California to this place that has awful stuff called “snow.” I’m glad other pets are getting in on the action now during the pandemic, but I’m an OG contributor.
What’s your alternative “dream” career and why? I aspire to be a Roomba and have been training my hardest since Mom got me.
Names: Lester and Wembley Freese-Summerlin
Species: Little Brothers
Favorite food: random things on the floor no living thing should eat
Likes: Wembley – fetch, speed-eating, when the dishwasher starts, shoulder rides; Lester – meditation time, biting human knees when hungry
Dislikes: Wembley – times of day when bowl is empty; Lester – Wembley after 9:00 PM
Favorite song: He Ain’t Heavy He’s My Brother
Favorite movie: Oh, Brother, Where Art Thou?
Favorite TV show: Band of Brothers
Contributions to Access: minimal, honestly
What’s your alternative “dream” career and why? Wembley – culinary anthropologist; Lester – box tester
Name: Gryphon Axelrod-Affeldt
Species: Extra giant, extra ferocious TIGER
Favorite food: Muffins, pumpkin pie, bone-in ribeye
Likes: Playing fetch, positioning myself between people and laptop screens, attacking ankles
Dislikes: Being pulled into video conference calls, delays on dinner
Favorite song: The birds chirping in the bush outside the bedroom window
Favorite movie: The birds chirping in the bush outside the bedroom window
Favorite TV show: The birds chirping in the bush outside the bedroom window
Contributions to Access: In addition to working on my daily news flashes, once I added 83 pages to an industry trend analysis and another time I chewed through the cord of a USB mouse in the middle of the workday.
What’s your alternative “dream” career and why? Biologist. I love poking bits of meat with my paws, and I have successfully dissected several stuffed toy mice (plus one catnip pumpkin).
Name: Luna Blue
Species: half pupperino, half wolfie
Favorite food: BREAD cheese, chimken, steak, the white stuff in puppichinos
Likes: walkies, chasing squirrels, zoomies, bellies, playing with my friends in the park, begging for food, nonna’s house
Dislikes: umbrellas, baths, not getting belly rubs
Favorite song: when my mommy asks “do you wanna go for a walk?”
Favorite movie: The Secret Life of Pets 2
Favorite TV show: Sportscenter
Contributions to Access: boosting morale in the office, hiding under mimi’s desk, and decreasing the treato supply
What’s your alternative “dream” career and why? Chef. I love hanging out in the kitchen while my humans cook any meal. Maybe if I can learn how to make the food then my mommy will let me eat it too!
Name: Feliz and Joey
Species: Just a couple of mixed up small dogs with some chihuahua and dachshund thrown in
Favorite food: Carrots, sweet potatoes, salmon and whatever Feliz can steal from Joey
Likes: Tennis balls, rubber squeaky balls and acting bigger than our britches on walks
Dislikes: Getting skunked
Favorite song: I Can’t Stand the Rain
Favorite movie: Really, anything that’s watchable from the couch
Favorite TV show: Animal Planet
Contributions to Access: We stay away from the office – our little gift to the SF staff.
What’s your alternative “dream” career and why? Joey – Security Officer.
Feliz – Ball Girl at the U.S. Open
Species: Husky-Pitbull-Rottweiler-Akita Mix
Favorite food: Crunchy foods including kale stems, raw sweet potatoes and tortilla chips
Likes: Running, hunting and men
Dislikes: Vacuums and humans dancing in my presence
Favorite song: Space Oddity
Favorite movie: Milo and Otis
Favorite TV show: The Twilight Zone
Contributions to Access: Making my mom look like she has an itchy leg problem on video calls, when really she’s just scratching me because I have a fit if she stops.
What’s your alternative “dream” career and why? Magician. I’m very good at silently disappearing from any enclosure and making snacks vanish.
Name: Papa Pig / Big Pig
Species: Berkshire Pig
Favorite food: Chicken feed, beer grain, veggies….honestly, I’ll try anything once
Likes: Eating and lady pigs
Dislikes: Anyone getting between him and his ladies
Favorite song: Jump in the Line
Favorite movie: Cloudy with a Chance of Meatballs
Favorite TV show: Diners, Drive-Ins and Dives
Contributions to Access: Assisting with the production of cute piglets to make everyone go “aww”
What’s your alternative “dream” career and why? Landscaper, because at over 650lbs, my appetite can make fast work of unwanted plants
Species: Great Pyrenees/Anatolian Shepherd
Favorite food: Fresh meats
Likes: Belly rubs, borking and playing
Favorite song: Hey Good Lookin’
Favorite movie: It’s a Wonderful Life
Favorite TV show: Foghorn Leghorn
Contributions to Access: Guarding the chickens who lay the eggs Madeline brings to Access
What’s your alternative “dream” career and why? Bank robber, I am responsible 24/7 as I guard hundreds of chickens, goats and sheep, so I often wonder what life as an outlaw would be like.
Name: Mama Goat (goat in foreground)
Species: Boer Goat
Favorite food: Chicken feed
Likes: Sitting in giant holes and staring out into the void
Favorite song: Walkin’ After Midnight
Favorite movie: Men Who Stare at Goats
Favorite TV show: The Great British Bakeoff
Contributions to Access: They’ve yet to really figure out what I get up to
What’s your alternative “dream” career and why? Professional busybody, I’m always butting into someone else’s business.
Name: Henry Cook
Species: German Short Haired Pointer
Favorite food: Bacon, birds, rabbits, squirrels, groundhogs, bees
Likes: Running at the speed of sound, Barking at all things that move, tug a war, going for long walks
Dislikes: his picture being taken!
Favorite song: anything country, henry loves to dance and spin to fun songs
Favorite movie: henry likes to sleep through movies
Favorite TV show: dog show
Contributions to Access: I visit my mom who is always staring at a computer and put my paw on her arm to let her know I am here for her!
What’s your alternative “dream” career and why? None I am living my dream job… love my family, run, chase critters, and take care of my little sister
Name: Petunia Cook
Species: Doberman/Hound Mix
Favorite food: Strawberries, Carrots, Bacon, CHEESE
Likes: Playing fetch, belly rubs, sleeping
Dislikes: her feet tickled, Henry running and barking, anyone hitting each other, and ANY STRANGER ON HER PROPERTY (her bark is all she has… step towards her and she runs crying)
Favorite song: nope music makes my parents dance and I don’t like goofy shenanagans
Favorite movie: with Henry she likes to sleep through movies on our laps
Favorite TV show: dog show
Contributions to Access: I sleep on a bed next to my mom daily! When she moves I move! I make sure she is not bothered so she can get her work done!
What’s your alternative “dream” career and why? I am living my dream job as a protector to my family and being loved daily by my family!
Name: Matilda “Jane Lane” Gotts
Species: A cat of the tortoiseshell and white family
Favorite food: Prosciutto/serrano ham
Likes: Being in charge, being brushed, waking people up, cheese
Dislikes: Citrus, whistling, the vacuum, my mortal enemy – water
Favorite song: Queen Bitch by David Bowie
Favorite movie: Bird videos on YouTubez – love them budgies
Favorite TV show: Game of Thrones – I’m a Sansa
Contributions to Access: I once emergency FaceTimed a coworker at 4am using my toe beans
What’s your alternative “dream” career and why? Opera diva/national intelligence agent/Queen of All – because I’m worth it.